The Evaporation Of FriendshipBy
Last week, I came across an interesting thesis expounded by a reporter in a Boston paper. He says the biggest threat facing middle-aged men isn’t obesity or smoking, but loneliness. Middle-aged men let their friendships lapse, experience depression as they age, and spiral downward from there.
I’m certainly guilty of letting old friendships stagnate, but I probably have a better excuse than most. I moved around a lot and far away after university, before there was e-mail and social networks to make staying in touch effortless, not that most of us do. I now live half a world away. I calculated that in the last 25½ years, I’ve only seen my best friend from university a total of less than two weeks. I went eight years without seeing him after college, though we stayed in touch by phone, and another seven years from the time I left the US to the time I returned for my first visit.
Seven or eight years ago, when I was living in a beach resort town in Thailand, I made a concerted effort to have Guys Nights Out at least once a month. Three to five guys would show up, enough to make it worthwhile and still keep it personal. All the better if one of the other guys brought along someone I didn’t know as long as the occasions remained a night out for just the guys. As time progressed, some of the other guys didn’t take the nights out seriously. One brought his prostitute-like ‘girlfriends.’ People didn’t make the time, they started moving away, and the nights got shelved.
[Click the picture to read the rest of this brilliante articlo, okay mates?]
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