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Home / Doug's Chocolate Republic  /   Review: Swisslion-Takovo's Eurocrem

     
Swisslion-Takovo's Eurocrem Blok 
Posted: 9 September 2011    5.0 
Swisslion Takovo Eurocrem Blok During the socialist Yugoslavian days when dinars were the king, the Eurocrem Blok could have been king of the Marxist candy bar roost in these parts, the Socialist Nutella if you will.   Getting classified as great milk chocolate isn't Swisslion-Takova's game. Their bar is a candy bar, not a chocolate bar, plain and simple. Eurocrem's lack of proper milk solid content should pose no threat to Serbia's planned accession to the European Union in 2014.   
Avg price/gram: USD 0.013   Cocoa %: 15*  Size: 100g  Serbia chocolate 
       
* Estimated cocoa solid content


Serbian-made Eurocrem, from the company Swisslion-Takova, was supposed to be an in joke.  Loyal Chocolate Republic benefactor, Aussie Dave, had bought a few of these Eurocrem Bloks for a camping trip, thinking they were from Albania.    "This bar has a shot at a '1' rating," he wrote.  As of this writing, there is no bar rated this low on the Chocolate Republic.  Wanting to fairly state that I had tried all kinds of chocolates, from the pinnacles of a chocolate Everest to the lows of chocolate covered trash, I perversely desired the Eurocrem to be so bad that it would set the benchmark for crappy within the Chocolate Republic's boundaries.    

Aussie Dave e-mailed me a photograph of the bar.  With no English on the wrapper and a color scheme and graphic design reminiscent of 1960's socialism in Eastern Europe, no one was putting high hopes on the bar.  This bar is the nerdy outcast invited to a chic party.  The kid thinks he's evolved to a respectable level of cool by getting invited, when he really only got the invite so the cool kids would have someone to laugh at.   Eurocrem was only invited to my party so that I'd have a '1' rated bar on the Chocolate Republic I could later refer to as the way not to make chocolate.  

The Eurocrem name originally comes from Italy.  The Gandola company produced -- and still produces -- a spread by that name.  In 1972, the then Yugoslavian company of Swisslion-Takovo licensed the name and sold the chocolate and hazelnut combo spread to the socialist masses.   The company is now considered Serbian after the disintegration of the Socialist Federal Republic of Yugoslavia in the early 90's. The Eurocrem Blok is a bar version of the spread, a layer of hazelnut cream sandwiched in between two layers of chocolate.   How bad could this be?

Not bad at all surprisingly.  During the socialist Yugoslavian days when dinars were the king, the Eurocrem Blok could have been king of the Marxist candy bar roost in these parts, the Socialist Nutella if you will.  My first complaint with the Eurocrem Blok is that the hazelnut cream filling is too sweet.  Tone down some of the sugar, Swisslion-Takovo.  Not all of us want to develop insulin resistance.  My second complaint is the chocolate.  The chocolate isn't the finest on any list you choose to draw up.  European rules dictate that any EU chocolate manufacturer, excluding Ireland and the UK, must have a minimum of 25% cocoa solids before marketing their bars as milk chocolate.  Eurocrem's chocolate is as far from qualifying for milk chocolate status as Bangladesh ever has of developing talking robotic sex slaves.  How much real cacao is in this bar?  We doubt Swisslion-Takovo even knows.  Getting classified as great milk chocolate isn't Swisslion-Takova's game though.  Their bar is a candy bar, not a chocolate bar, plain and simple.  Eurocrem's lack of proper milk solid content should pose no threat to Serbia's planned accession to the European Union in 2014.   

The Chocolate Republic is surprised Eurocrem has gone as far as it has.  It's now available in Australia and the United States.  Who'd have thought a bar with such strong socialist roots would be provoking talk -- all right, very faint whispers -- in capitalist nations far, far away.  Eurocrem is like an actor with marginal talent somehow finding his way into big budget A-list Hollywood productions, but in minor parts.  Actually, as I write this, I am even surprised I reviewed it for the Republic.   

Eurocrem got invited to a party no one wanted it to attend, and now who's laughing?  Swisslion-Takovo, all the way to the capitalist banks.      

If you liked reading this, consider savoring these reviews:
 Theo Orange from USA -- 70% cocoa solids
 Whittakers Fruit & Nut from New Zealand -- 23% cocoa solids
 The Complete Chocolate Republic Index


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