/ Doug's Chocolate Republic /
Posted: 22 September 2011
Too bad Frey doesn't know what it's doing. Imagine a mediocre chocolate maker combining his subpar
milk chocolates with a sloppy tiramisu recipe and calling the final product innovative. That atrocity is this bar. The chocolate had a slippery sleazy feel, just like its manufacturer.
price/gram: USD 0.031
Cocoa %: 37
I'll summarize Frey in the
very sentence they print on the back of their chocolate bar
wrappers: "Frey is the best selling chocolate and
therefore number 1 in Switzerland."
Is that good English?
Is it clever? Does it make Frey stand out? Not
really. Actually, it's misleading, just like Frey's
chocolates are. It would've sufficed for Frey to say
"Frey is Switzerland's best-selling chocolate" and leave it
at that. Being the best selling may make you number 1
. . . or it may not. Actually, whether Frey is
or isn't Switzerland's best selling chocolate is open for
interpretation. It is, if you measure the amount of
chocolate produced and sold by Frey's factories. It isn't if
you discount all the private-label branding Frey does, where
the consumers don't even know they're buying a chocolate
manufactured by Frey. Frey only started pushing out its own brand
of chocolates around 2007.
Frey hasn't impressed me in
the past and I wouldn't have gone near them again if the
choice were mine. I was grocery shopping with my wife in an
upmarket grocery store called Gourmet Market. As we were
approaching the checkout aisle, of course what do we see but
chocolates. Grocery stores know that placing the junk
food just before the checkout counter always grabs a few
extra bucks out of your wallet. My wife loves
tiramisu, and when she saw the name on this Frey bar, she
knew she wanted to try it. She wasn't concerned about
the brand. The chocolates could be from Switzerland or Sudan. She didn't know or care.
Tiramisu is one of those
desserts I didn't know about, then one day did, then thought
in retrospect I always knew about it. Doing some
research on tiramisu for this article, I realize I couldn't
have always known about it. Depending upon whose
account you believe, tiramisu as an Italian dessert was
invented sometime between the end of 1969 and 1980.
It's a new dessert -- ladyfingers quickly dipped in coffee
to hold their shape, later assembled with zabaglione (a mix
of egg yolks, sugar, Marsala, lemon zest, and vanilla
extract), pastry cream, and mascarpone cheese. I love
the stuff. I've sampled it more in close to 5
years in Thailand than I ever did in my entire life leading
up to that.
Too bad mass producer Frey
doesn't know what it's doing. Imagine a mediocre
chocolate maker combining his subpar milk chocolates with a
sloppy tiramisu recipe and calling the final product
innovative. That atrocity is this bar.
Really, how could this chocolate or tiramisu be good?
The chocolate contains vegetable oils so Frey can reduce the
amount of more expensive cocoa butter. The tiramisu
part uses mascarpone powder, not real mascarpone cheese.
Frey's Tiramisu is too sweet.
The bar is very thin and you don't get a sense of the
various layers you'd be relishing in a real (well-made)
tiramisu. The chocolate had a slippery sleazy feel,
just like its manufacturer.
The tiramisu at the hotel
where my wife works costs about the same as this bar, after
you apply her employee discount. I'll be heading over
to her hotel the next time and drop this one in the trash
bin on the way out.